Continuing

Well, for lots of folks the last couple of months have been tough, myself included. Each heavy thing on my plate would have been difficult enough on its own but has been compounded by the other heavy things on my plate. I’ve been using my skills, but they don’t always feel like they take care of everything, leaving me feeling tired, cranky, anxious, and overwhelmed. 

Coping tools are an important part of dealing with life’s downs and we often see them as needing to take away all the pain or anxiety, but they usually don’t. When they don’t, we can feel like they’re useless or we’ve failed, but in reality, we haven’t failed and neither have they. Sometimes, life is just hard, and we need to continue to use our skills knowing they do help.

So, here’s what I’m continuing to do:

• Rest as much as I am able and try not to worry if I have a sleepless night because my mind won’t shut off. 

• Exercise when I can and as much as I can. Living with chronic illness means I have to exercise carefully to avoid post-exertional malaise, but I find a short walk outside beneficial.

• Balance healthy foods with comfort foods. I’m not as hard on myself for eating ice cream if I have had some fruit and vegetables and taken a walk.

• Asking for help is not my strong suit, but it is something that I am able to do more easily now than in the past. The support I have received in the last few months from family and friends has helped me through the roughest of days.

• Laughing every single day is something else I value; whether it is a cartoon or favorite show, I try to laugh daily.

• Getting creative helps to chase away the blues and worry. Knitting helps me keep stress in check, but for you it might be playing an instrument or throwing pots.

• Going to therapy is another important factor in keeping me on track. In addition to EMDR Therapy for clearing out the old stuff I’ve accumulated over the years, therapy provides a place to let it all out and get feedback on how I’m doing.

• Practice! Practice! Practice! If your coping skills are new, you’ve got to practice them so that they are more effective when you need them. 

Continuing to use your skills even when it doesn’t feel like they are working is as important as having many tools in your toolbox. Remember, too, that difficult times are temporary and you will get through it.